Gary
Here for a checkup. Mostly here to talk.
If you do well, they'll write:
★★★★★ “Great listener. Didn't find anything, but nodded a lot.”
The patients
The Bottom Line Clinic has eight regulars. Each one has a condition, a temper, and a review already half-written about you.
Brenda
Brought snacks. For you. Eat something.
If you do well, they'll write:
★★★★★ “Five stars! Ate two muffins. Niece's birthday in June? You're invited. Seated next to her.”
Marcel
Does not speak. Will not speak. (…)
If you do well, they'll write:
★★★★★ “(Five fingers. Standing ovation. Throws invisible roses. Bows to you.)”
Captain Vlad
Personal trainer. Personally terrified.
If you do well, they'll write:
★★★★★ “NEW PR: Fully relaxed. Coach was patient. Gains: emotional. 5/5. Signing up for a year.”
Dr. Prendergast
Retired surgeon. Unretired critic.
If you do well, they'll write:
★★★★★ “Accept as is. First time in thirty-one years. Do not frame this.”
Tyler
Streams everything. Yes, everything.
If you do well, they'll write:
★★★★★ “doc was SO gentle 😭 would get examined on stream again #BottomLineClinic #ad”
Dale
Knows there's a chip. Has receipts.
If you do well, they'll write:
★★★★★ “DOC BELIEVED ME. OR IS VERY GOOD AT PRETENDING. EITHER WAY: 5 STARS.”
Big Ron
Drives all night. Sleeps anywhere.
If you do well, they'll write:
★★★★★ “Slept great.”
Hidden patients
Five more patients turn up only under certain conditions. We won't say who. Don't ask what the last one looks like.
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